I Hope You've Had The Time Of Your Life

Last night, in the car, one of the local DJ's announced the upcoming songs and artists. One of them being our beloved Green Day. From the back seat Abby's excitement is uncontainable and she yells, "MOMM! Green Day.....they say GREEN DAY!!"

Could a mother be ANY prouder? Most parents hope that they instill special talents like being a good speller...or a good athlete...or have really great hair. Me? I aim for the inevitable love for Green Day. The fact that the three year old has a love for Billie Joe and Co. that rivals my love...well, it just does the heart good. It's right up there wiith the first time she called me "mom."

Nevermind that she called my friend, Mary, "mom" BEFORE she called me "mom"....that's just a technicallity.

There are times when I look at my two girls and marvel at the fact that I'm a mom...even if I didn't get the title first. (Thanks to Mary.) I think about when they were born and how amazing those two events were. I think about the joy that feel as a mother...how a little voice singing "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" can bring you to tears...or how that first dribble down the soccer field brings out the absolute maniac out of you. Or the very first time your 3rd grader says that you don't have to walk them ALL the way to the class and you think your heart might break...and then smile the next day when they don't want you to leave. Even those times when you're about to pull your hair out because if they fight with eachother ONE MORE TIME you're gonna lose it...or when that same 3rd grader argues with you because her teacher told her a different way to do something...or when the three year old WILL NOT do what you ask her to. Being a mom (or a dad) is THE hardest job you will ever have. You will never feel so much guilt...so much happiness...so much pain...so much of a reward in your life.

The mom's of today put so much pressure on themselves to be "the perfect mom." There is this "need to please" and the need to prove that Wonder Woman does exist...and she's taken on the secret identity of that mom over there that drives the Volvo. It is almost like each mom is competing against the other to see who can put on the best fundraiser or bake the best cookies...or see who has the best hair.

Since pre-school...I've felt that need to compete. Like I'm not a good enough mom anyway because I work outside the home why bother trying to keep up with those other moms who are outdoing the other at any given opportunity. I'm so very tired of those mom's that will sit there and talk bad about other moms/parents just to further validate what they do. I mean, who died and left them in charge to make other parents feel like crap?? When Paige started 2nd Grade, I made a committment to myself that I would NOT get sucked into that vortex again. I would NOT try to compete with those other moms for the top spot only to get voted off the "island" when the next up and coming mom found something else to dazzle everyone around her. I've done a good job of not getting sucked in. I have let myself feel inferior (thanks to Oozie Lady) but I stay out of the drama...I stay out of the issues that come up because the other parents create those issues...and I make it a point to stay away from those parents and keep them at a distance when they just won't stay away.

I came accross a book the other night as I wondered the book store. (An evening at the book store BY MYSELF...THANKS DAD!) It was a new release written by a mom who takes a hard look at todays mom and how that monster was created. Just reading the inside cover of the book, I felt a connection to this other mother that wrote a book on the craziness that is: MOTHER. Why does every mother have something to prove? If ever there were an idea for a reality show (and please know I don't condone it) it would be mothers competing against eachother. The mom that throws the best birthday part or play date...or the mom that bakes the best cakes or sews the best costume.

It's disgusting.

I love how much I enjoy my daughters' school expereinces one I removed myself from the evil vortex of mothers. I still have (many) moments of inferiority complex...but I suppose that is to be expected when Little Suzy's mommy just sent out the birthday invitations for an event that rivals the Golden Globe Awards. It's excessive...and it's unnecessary...and I'm glad that it doesn't bother me as much anymore.

Bu then, I'm on my way to go color with Paige and sing (edited) Green Day songs with Abby. Life just doesn't get much better than that.